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Joke of the Day
"The best things in life are free. The second best things are very expensive."
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"You know what's better than being married? Everything."
"Sometimes I'm depressed and then a girl stars one of my tweets and it's like YAAAAYYYY NEW GIRLFRIEND!!!!!"
"An irishman walks out of a bar..."
"I want to tell a chemistry joke... But all the good ones argon."
"Throughout the summer Trump's campaign was on the gas pedal... But now they have turned on Cruz control."
"What do you call a Spanish matador who is not very good at his job? I'd say he's fairly incapa**bull**."
"Where did the small road go to college? Tulane University"
"What do you call an elf that sings? A wrapper."
"What do you call it when you get an erection at a funeral? Mourning Wood."