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Joke of the Day

"It's a damn shame when a man works hard all week then comes home for dinner and relaxation but has to work extra hard to get love and appreciation from his woman."

"Snoop Dogg seems to be investing in a company that will deliver weed to your house in 10 minutes... Sadly, the name Instagram is taken."

"What do you call a knight with a morning star? Don"

"I was up late last night watching Philadelphia with Tom Hanks... ...We were the finalists in a cream cheese staring competition."

"Tell the dude at Starbucks your name is Poison Coffee, and when he calls your name, fall out of your chair onto the floor."

"*Sees girl trying to reach soup on top shelf* ""Here let me get that"" I say [Beacuse I'm much taller] *I put the soup in my cart & walk away*"

"What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? The canoe tips."

"I once watched a documentary on ferns because the remote was out of reach."

"Two guys are talking: (1) - I've bought a tour to my mother-in-law. (2) - Your mother-in-law???!!! (1) - Why not to Bagdad."

"How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? No clue. Too busy masturbating."