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Joke of the Day

"""Son, I found a condom in your room"" ""Gee, thanks, Grandpa!"" ""Why are you calling me Grandpa?"" ""Because I couldn't find it yesterday."""

"What does a Doctor do when he needs 50 bags full of fruits? He goes to Orlando and checks the Pulse."

"Just got hired on at a high end restaurant, my main job so far has been oyster preparation And I've gotta say, it really shucks"

"Judas: Still on for friday? ""Jesus: friday?"" ""Judas: Yeah, the Last Supper."" ""Jesus: The what?"" ""Judas: Supper. Normal supper with the fellas."""

"So the American people's choices for President will apparently be either Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton. That is the joke. There's no punchline here."

"Just heard a woman ask if she left her teeth over there Really hoping this is Halloween related"

"My wife slapped me when I told her I'm buying her a puppy for Christmas. I thought she'd be excited to hear that she's getting a little husky..."

"Why didn't the life guard save the hippy? He was too far out man."

"should I get a ""hummus"" tattoo in Hebrew and Arabic?"

"Write the biggest mistake that you've ever made in childhood. I was believing that all people are black or white until the age of 14."