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Joke of the Day

"Why did the blind man's alphabet soup only have 25 letters in it? Because he can't ""C"""

"Q: Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: He was hit by a bus"

"My favorite thing about camping is when I stay home & don't."

"Do you want a bag? A guy goes to the store to buy condoms. ""Do you want a bag?"" the cashier asks. ""No,"" the guy says, ""she's not that ugly."""

"I wonder what appeared over Thomas Edison's head when he got the idea for the light bulb..."

"Did you hear Gotye converted from Judaism to Catholicism? After realizing he didn't need to follow Jewish customs, he exclaimed to the rabbi, ""you didn't have to cut me off!"""

"What kind of weed do reptiles smoke? Mariguana."

"""Doctor, doctor! I need a new pair of glasses!"" ""I can see that - this is a hotdog stand."""

"If Trump wins the election, Mexicans be like.. [removed]"

"[Hostage situation] Um I don't want to be ""that hostage"", but I just want to let you know I have a gluten allergy."