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Joke of the Day

"If I could have one superpower it would be knowing definitively if people like me or not"

"Saw a hitchhiker holding a sign Anywhere But Here' So I swerved, hit him. Now he's in a ditch. Hope that's ok, he wasn't really specific."

"Twitter - We built this city on block and troll......"

"Whats the difference between a Cat and a Compound Sentence? One has claws at the end of its paws, one has a pause at the end of its clause."

"*TSA officer opens my suitcase, disembodied fist pops out and punches him* me: sry sir I forgot I packed a powerful punch *TSA guns me down*"

"Did you hear about the time when King Arthur slept with another woman? It was a one knight stand."

"what do you call Coq Au Vin made with Two Buck Chuck? Chick n' Chuck!"

"I try to refrain from farting while I masturbate. For I am a gentleman."

"Hitler and his men are having a meeting. Hitler: We will kill 6 million Jews and 1 clown. Men: Why the clown? Hitler: See! I told you nobody cares about the Jews!"

"My father was from Iceland and my mother was from Cuba. I'm an Ice Cube."