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Joke of the Day

"""Yes I understand that's your face, but it's also the place where I need to put my butthole."" - Cats"

"Why did the iguana get a prescription for viagra? For his reptile dysfunction."

"I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car."

"I was in the supermarket and I thought I saw my name on a loaf of bread. I looked again and it said ""thick cut""."

"What is the difference between a black Jew and a white Jew? Black Jews have to sit at the back of the gas chamber."

"[SPELLING BEE] JUDGE: Bourgeoisie ME: Really? W o w JUDGE: *annoyed* Sir, the word is Bourgeoisie ME:*clears throat* Eff - U - See - Kay - U"

"[OC] What do you call a rodent that sells illegal guns? An Armadealer"

"Everything I need to know about whether or not cops are allowed to search my car I learned from Jay-Z songs."

"Why do whites call it reverse racism? because, only whites are racist."

"A surgeon was put on trial for sewing several people's genitals to their faces. When asked why he would commit such a heinous crime he replied ""Eh, just to fuck with their heads."""