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Joke of the Day

"Son: ""I got expelled"" Dad: ""How?"" Son: ""I wrote 2 + 2 = 41 on the whiteboard."" Dad: ""That's pretty dumb but-"" Son: ""Then my teacher told me to go up to the board..."" Dad: ""Ok?"" Son: ""And rub 1 out."""

"What goes: 'click' is that it? 'click' is that it? 'click' is that it? A blind guy with a rubix cube"

"Why wasn't Christ born in Ireland? Because they couldn't find 3 wise men and a virgin."

"Who would steal an artificial leg? I'm stumped."

"My husband and I both have colds but only his is really really bad."

"I read a story by a pregnant woman on reddit She was having trouble with her pregnancy, and she said she would post an update after it was over. OP delivered."

"It took 11 years but hubby can finally read me like a book. A Greek book. Read upside down wearing a blindfold. It's a vast improvement."

"What are the three rings of marriage? The first one is the engagement ring...the second one is the wedding ring...and the third one is the suffering."

"The Bible Belt - the land where you pretend not to recognize each other in the liquor store."

"Oscar Pistorius has sacked his legal team. He has now hired Celtic as he heard they lost both legs and still managed to win."