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Joke of the Day

"""My mother made me a whore."" To which someone replied: ""If I supply the yarn will she make me one?"" -From *All That You Love Will Be Carried Away*"

"Why don't they have sex ed and drivers ed on the same day in the middle east? There are never enough camels to go around."

"The first time I realised I was dyslexic... Was when I went to a toga party dressed as a goat."

"A Cleveland Browns fan passed away In his will, he wrote that he wanted 6 players from the team to serve as his pallbearers, so that they could let him down one last time."

"If I was an operating system, your process would have top priority."

"Just got the new Windows... ... such a pane"

"What do you call the occasionally toxic, organic substances that accumulate over the years in a hoarder's house? Horticulture."

"What do you call pizza that isn't yours? Impersonal pizza"

"Why did C++ look down at C? It thought C lacked class. i'll see myself out"

"[At historic site] Guide: Questions? Me: What's the wifi password? G: I meant about 19th century life. M: Oh....Dost thou have thy password?"