225362

Joke of the Day

"1 Ring to rule them all, 1 Ring to find them, 1 Ring to bring them all & in the darkness bind them. 3 rings to let Mum know you're home safe"

"A programmers wife tells him to buy groceries She says buy bread, and if there are eggs get a dozen. He came home with twelve loaves of bread"

"I went to Premature Ejaculators Anonymous but nobody was there. I guess I came too soon."

"How is American beer similar to having sex in a canoe? It's fucking close to water. (A Canadian just told me this joke)"

"What does a pirate say when he turns 80? Aye matey"

"You know what's fucking shit? A scat fetish"

"I could never succeed at chemistry. I Guess that's why it's called chemist ""try"""

"I tried planting some seeds on myself... I wasn't into it at first, but now it's growing on me."

"The problem with the rest of the world is that they are always 5 drinks behind."

"What Do You Call A Fight Between An Illegal Immigrant And A Child Molester? Alien vs. Predator"