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Joke of the Day

"Two Muslim vampires are discussing the weather... Vampire 1: It's really Sunni outside. Vampire 2: Shiite! Courtesy of my 8-year-old."

"""I'm leaving you"" ""why?"" ""Your jokes are old and tiresome"" ""but, I can updog"" ""What's updog?"" ""NOTHIN, WHAT'S UP WI-"" *slams door*"

"Why do pencils shave? To look sharp. &nbsp; &nbsp; Credit: 3rd grade me."

"Why was the chronic masturbater restrained to his hospital bed? He kept trying to discharge himself"

"Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a supermarket trolley? A: The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own."

"If Bob Marley were alive today, what would he listen to music on? An iAndiPod. Just made that one up. I can hear the groans."

"Knock Knock... Who's there? To. To who? To whom*"

"My computer said hello to me It's a Dell."

"A chicken walks into a bar and clucks at the bartender. The bartender says, ""No fowl language allowed"""

"Why was the computer stressed out when it got home from work? 'Cause it had a hard drive."