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Joke of the Day

"My friend said he was really down because of his car troubles... I told him i didn't wan't to hear his saab story."

"What do you call a singer who sells meat? A Deli."

"Whats the most obvious feature shared by a leprechaun and a sober Irishman? Neither exist."

"""Needless to say... ..."""

"""Walk it off"" does not apply to everything. Stupidity, for example. You're not walking that shit off unless it's in to oncoming traffic"

"Jeremy Clarkson has been suspended. He must have done something that even the BBC find inexcusable So that rules out child abuse then...."

"I have a boat that beats all other boats in races... ... It's a champion ship."

"[meeting] BOSS: We need a name that gives us a good ad slogan ME: Perhapselline? MY NEMESIS GARY: Maybelline? B: You're incredible, Gary"

"Yesterday, I lost a wedding cake.. ..but today, I fondant."

"Why was the blot of ink so sad? It's mother was in the pen and it didn't know how long the sentence was."