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Joke of the Day

"I told my doctor I was having issues during sex. He said Cialis. Could someone tell me where I find Alice?"

"When I make you breakfast in bed, the least you can say is thank you. I mean what's with all this ""how did you get in my house"" nonsense?"

"One of my many niche-market jokes They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so why haven't beekeepers monopolized the fashion industry?"

"How do you start a rave in Ethiopia? Staple a piece of toast to the ceiling."

"How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They just beat the walls because they are black"

"The worst moment for an insomniac is that flutter of realisation that you are falling asleep, which smacks you wide awake again."

"My jokes are like hot chicks... Hard to get, and once you do they're not nearly as good as you thought they'd be."

"A sheep, a drum, and a snake all fall off a cliff... Ba-dumm-tss"

"Email subject line: ""Your invited."" Thanks, I'll bring an apostrophe and an e."

"My ex-wife still misses me... But her aim is gettin better."