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Joke of the Day

"Judas: The one I kiss is Jesus Christ. Soldier: You can just point to him. Judas: (putting on lip-balm) I don't tell you how to do your job."

"What do vegetables watch when they're feeling frisky? Cornography"

"I waited 279 days before I made my first post on Reddit, apparently I could've waited 558 days and received the same response."

"Guy:Hey what are you doing? Girl:unzipping it Guy:why? Girl:I want to see how big it is. .. *Unzips tent and gets inside* Girl:nice, nice.."

"What did the gay deer say after leaving the club? I can't believe I blew ten bucks in there."

"Sideburns of Reddit, I mustache you a question Not really. I just came here to... *bust your chops.* \*snickers maniacally\*"

"Call your son Jack So you can drop your wife and Jack off every morning. (Actually heard a friend said that)"

"Do you sell hot dogs? Because you know how to make a wiener stand."

"What do you call a virgin redneck? An orphan"

"Why do American beer companies always advise that their beer should be served cold? So you can tell it apart from urine"