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Joke of the Day

"Violets are blue, roses are red Violets are blue, roses are red. We're doing it backwards, That's what she said."

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"[camping] ""Dad I'm afraid a raccoon is gonna come in my tent and eat me"" -don't be silly. It'll probably be a bear. Sleep tight."
"Who does Hitler call when his dog is sick? A Veteran Aryan"
"Progeria jokes get old real quick."
"Fidel Castro just died, Cubans can be finally happy that their country will be ruled by the young generation led by a much younger leader. His 85 year old brother!"
"My wife and I do it doggy-style... ...she plays dead and I beg. -Dan Chopin"
"""Doc,"" I said, ""every time I fart the room fills with smoke and stinks of petrol. What's the matter with me?"" ""That's easy,"" he said. ""You're exhausted."""
"I've decided to become a raw carnivore... I guess you can say I'm going cold turkey"
"Damn girl are you playboy magazine? Cause holy fuck you have a pile of issues"
"I went to my first Muslim birthday party yesterday Most of the party games were normal, but fuck me pass the parcel was scary."
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