221640

Joke of the Day

"*Makes joke on Twitter* *5 Retweets* *Makes same joke on Facebook* *5 comments from aunts saying that the joke was inappropriate*"

"How do you know which potato is a prostitute? It's the one that says, ""Idaho."""

"Did you hear about the Leper going for the masturbation world record? Eventually he pulled it off!"

"Guys! The Ultimate Warrior Is Not Dead! He just decided to return to Parts Unkown."

"Why does the rabbit hide Easter eggs? Because he is ashamed of fucking the chicken."

"I just slept with Pinnochio. No strings."

"Driving a rental car means never knowing the safest place to wipe a booger without haphazardly finding someone else's."

"This girl just spilt ice all over my record player. I played it cool."

"After I die, I want someone to periodically log in as me so it looks like I'm haunting Facebook."

"I always use chloroform when stealing a child. Really puts the ""nap"" in ""kidnap""."