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Joke of the Day

"Why didn't the recently single goose lose her job when she made a mistake? Because she had one heck of an ex-goose"

"Hi, what can I get for 25 cents? You can get the fuck out."

"I'm holding a party for people who can never reach orgasm If you can't come let me know."

"How does a feminist screw in a light bulb? She holds the bulb up to the socket and then expects the world to revolve around her."

"Student loans: because you should know what it's like to be one of the poor people you're always going on about"

"Just read it Just reddit"

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Marie Antionette Barbie ...with removable head; guillotine included"

"*bursts into English convention* GRAB ALL THE STUFF YOU CAME WITH THE BUILDING'S ON FIRE *crickets* Christ. THE STUFF WITH WHICH YOU CAME"

"I would make a gay joke.. Butt fuck it."

"A friend got some vinegar in his ear now he suffers from pickled hearing."