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Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend called me pedophile earlier. That's a big word for an eight year old"
Next Joke
"What did Hitmonlee say to Hitmonchan when he said he said his jokes sucked? ""I'm sorry , I'm not very good at executing punchlines."""
"Criminal on the electric chair. The officer asks: Any last wishes? The criminal: Please hold my hand"
"People who get offended when I breast feed publicly can fuck off What I'm doing is totally natural and strengthens the relationship between me and my dog"
"Why do hot girls always go for assholes? I don't even like pegging."
"What kind of jokes do filipinos make? Punny ones"
"Jokes are sort of like Middle Eastern policies. Some are decent, but it's really the execution that counts."
"What's the difference between a rooster and a lawyer? The rooster's primal urge is to cluck defiance."
"*Reads your tweets, vomits into a bucket, mails bucket to you*- see what you made me do?"
"The only time a moth flies in a straight line is... while farting"