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Joke of the Day

"This girl told me she liked to be teased in the bedroom so we laid down and I said her new glasses looked stupid and she starts crying. wtf?"

"A short joke my GF told me My penis"

"Spent 15 damn minutes looking for my phone in the car last night while using my phone as a light, yup that high.."

"It'd be funny if everyone told their kids Steve Buscemi is the tooth fairy."

"The string of expletives that poured from my mouth when I woke up at 3 pm to realize my alarm didn't go off was pure smut poetry"

"How will you know your sister has period? When you taste blood in your father's dick"

"Are you alone? Afraid? Lonely? Then you'd better turn up the TV because I just heard a noise"

"A redhead tells her blonde friend she had sex with a Brazilian while on vacation. The blonde says, ""You slut! How many is a brazilian?"""

"Do you charge for circumcisions? No, I only take tips"

"Someone told me recently that the healthcare.gov website was built by a Canadian company. I guess that explains why the site is constantly freezing."