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Joke of the Day

"A guy goes to his Rabbi to price a circumcision... He says, ""Rabbi, how much do you charge for a circumcision?"" And the Rabbi says, ""Not much, I just keep the tips."""

"Saw a girl with three lip-ring piercings on the subway this morning. Took everything in my power not to attach a shower curtain."

"""Let's give the bad guy a ponytail."" - 80s movies"

"""Ugh, it's so dark!"" *shivers* ""And cold! Why is it so huge? It's, like, jeez, does it go on forever?!"" - Larry, the worst astronaut"

"Why does the KKK like christmas? Because it's the one day that they have an excuse to hang coloured balls from trees."

"How did the mermaid get into a car crash? ...because she was fish tailing!"

"Families that do Christmas card photo shoots months before Christmas have the organizational skills of high-level Nazis."

"How do you organize a Space Party? You Planet!"

"What happens when an elephant sits on a car? It breaks the trunk."

"I have reached a stage where I'm looking for a real eye opener for a girl friend. It would be a nice change because all my previous girl friends were Asian."