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Joke of the Day

"Every time I hang out with my old roommate from college, we get drunk. I think he may have a drinking problem..."

"The guy who spelled 'Wednesday' like that sure pulled off some shit."

"""one Man's trash is other man's treasure"" Isn't the best way to tell your kid that he is adopted. Credits- /u/theone1221"

"What's the difference between jam and marmalade? Nsfw You can't marmalade your cock up someones ass."

"What color were Kurt Cobaine's eyes? Blue. One blue one way and one blue the other way."

"If you own a karate dojo and you don't make your employees answer the phone ""Hiiiiiiiiya"" You're doing it wrong"

"You can catch a lot of flies with honey, but you can catch more honeys by being fly."

"My new year's resolution... 2K, and 16 extra pixels."

"A package comes in the mail at the post office & it's business as usual... But when I cum in the mail at the post office it's public indecency & a felony.."

"Why can't Irishmen be lawyers? They can never get past the bar."