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Joke of the Day

"How many Vietnam vets does it take to screw in a lightbulb? HOW THE FUCK WOULD YOU KNOW? YOU WEREN'T THERE!!!!"

"How to be rich for the rest of your life... Legally change your name to ""Rich"""

"What do you say when you leave the UAE? Dubai-bye!"

"What do you call a tornado holding a spork? The Mersenne Twister."

"If you're a germaphobe and you know it... wash your hands!"

"Q: What happens when you eat bullets? A: Your hair grows out in bangs."

"I don't smoke, I don't drink, and I don't curse... god damn it - I left my cigarettes at the bar!!"

"Winds of 108mph, structural damage, flying debris, massive depression, icy blasts, communication difficulties, untold misery and suffering... Yes, I forgot our anniversary again."

"We had a pop quiz in culinary school today. It was a piece of cake."

"Q: On a scale from 1 to 10, what is your favorite color in the english alphabet? A: Yes"