219339

Joke of the Day

"Have you heard about the late great actor? ""Wow, he's dead?"" *Actor strolls in* Nope, just never on time."

"Men are like floors... Lay them right the first time, and you can walk all over them."

"Someone stole my Microsoft Office and they're gonna pay! You have my word!"

"What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded."

"Potassium and Oxygen went on a date. It was OK."

"What do you need to have to do the dishes when you don't want to? Dishcipline This is literally a joke I told in a dream and I remembered it when waking up."

"If I ever get AIDS, I hope I get it from an Indian. Because he'll take them back."

"My best dating advice is to wait after you have two kids and a house before you tell her you speak elvish."

"What do you say Everytime maths wants you to calculate value of his X Dear Maths, I'm sick & tired of finding your 'X' she's gone dude and don't ask 'Y'"

"Why don't Greek people need sex? The government fucks them everyday!"