219155

Joke of the Day

"In preschool, I became friends with a little girl I showed her mine, and she showed me hers. However, a preschool teacher found out about it, and I was fired."

"My mother's star sign was cancer. Ironic how she died, really. She died due to fatal injuries from a giant crab attack."

"Ever since I got my antivirus check done on my computer. Single Asian ladies don't wanna do it with me anymore."

"What's the hardest part about skydiving? The ground."

"I dared my little brother to lick my dad's ass, and he did. So he dared me to lick my sister's pussy. Just FYI, the ass is called Toots and my sister's cat is Mr. Pickle. We're both 9 and 12"

"""Now, tilt your head and give me total scumbag!"" - Realtor headshot photographer"

"Why did the old lady fall in the well? Because she couldn't see that well"

"What's the difference between In-laws and 0utlaws? Outlaws are wanted."

"At my funeral, feed me into a woodchipper and point it at the mourners"

"Where can you always find kids by themselves? edit: i forgot to say please."