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Joke of the Day

"A guy was so bored he broke a watch with his bare hands. Then he said ""i've got too much time on my hands"""

"Waiter: These are the best eggs we've had for years. Diner: Well bring me some you haven't had around for that long."

"What is something that you can never eat for breakfast? Lunch and dinner."

"Taking to people about your child abuse experience is the toughest part. The last time i did it, i had to spend 7 years in jail."

"A man has started a business in Afghanistan. He's selling landmines that look like prayer mats... Prophets are going through the roof."

"The Eagles see a surge in sales .. .. amid the social medias resounding catch phrase, ""Who the fuck is Glen Fry ??"""

"I wonder if the Cabbage Patch Kids grew up to be bastards & whores that left their offspring in random gardens like their parents did."

"Why do mathematicians have a hard time moving on in relationships? Because they're always trying to find the x. They don't know y, either."

"I was going to castrate myself But I didn't have the balls."

"I'm not saying your cat doesn't care about you, I'm saying if Lassie was a cat, Timmy would still be in that well"