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Joke of the Day

"It's awkward when I have to pull someone aside and point out that my fly is open."

"My cleaning lady always leaves me a list of supplies she needs to clean the house. Not sure what she needs 20 boxes of cold medicine though"

"Girls who say, ""a lot of guys are after me"", should keep in mind that low prices always attract many customers."

"Whale junior: Dad, where did I come from? Papa whale: From my penis. Whale junior: Umm thanks? Papa whale: You're whalecum"

"GEEK BOOTY CALL... CHARISMA Looks like somebody rolled a 20 on their Charisma check!"

"I walked past a drug rehab facility today. There was a sign on the front lawn that read ""KEEP OFF THE GRASS!"""

"I used to rub my hair together when I was stressed... But now I'm dreading the consequences."

"'I want to see other kids.' ~Me, parenting."

"How is it that magic carpets are able to fly? They are powered by turban engines."

"What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? ... ackhh achkghk"