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Joke of the Day

"Burnt my Hawaiian pizza today ... Should of put it on aloha temperature."

"What do you get when you drop a piano down a mineshaft? A flat miner."

"Bruce Springsteen isn't very good at math I don't think anyone's heard him count past the number 4 in years."

"A man goes to the doctor and says ""Doctor! I've broken my arm in several places!"" The Doctor looks at him like he's an idiot and says ""Well then, don't go to those places..."""

"What's the difference between a WWE wrestler and a soccer player? A WWE wrestler will get up after faking an injury."

"How come if you eat two cookies you gain 3 lbs. Then when you take a major dump, you don't lose anything?"

"Did you hear about the gay fisherman who went for a check up They said if he wanted to get better, he had to stop going down on all the docks."

"What's the difference between a dentist and a sadist? Newer magazines. (Stolen shamelessly from Seinfeld)"

"What do you call a man with a penis in the middle of his face? Fuck nose."

"I was reading the book ""Great Expectations"" by Charles Dickens. It wasn't as good as I hoped it would be."