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Joke of the Day

"Don't eat the cookies so fast they'll keep. I know but I want to eat as many as I can before I lose my appetite !"

"What do you call a Syrian refugee on the Mediterranean? Bob What does a Syrian refugee call their pet? Dinner What's grosser than gross? Two Syrian refugees fighting over a tampon."

"What's the difference between a gang of pygmy's and a women's track team? One is a Cunning group of Runts....."

"I died while having sex with a hooker... I guess you could say I was coming and going at the same time."

"If your boss says ""Correct me if I'm wrong but aren't you supposed to be in at 8am?"" don't correct them. Its a trap. They hate being wrong."

"What did the alcoholic Dad, away on business, say to the bartender at the hotel bar? I'm ready to partiem with my perdiem *sorry, not a dad, and the bar tender didn't laugh either"

"Your Gay? I thought about being gay. But eons and eons of time made me into a tit loving. Vagina eating monster i just cant stop."

"Castles are great but I wish you could rent other forms of bouncy architecture"

"10 inches The other day my wife and i were about to have sex for the first time. She said she wanted 10 inches and wanted it to hurt. So i stuck her 5 times then hit her with a brick"

"I was doing some DIY the other day and took out my step ladder... I don't get on with my real ladder."