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Joke of the Day

"Searched my teens room for drugs, was told ""you don't give me enough money for drugs."" I don't know whether to be proud or up his allowance."

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"I made an animated graphic of the inside of an egg. ThatsTheYolk.gif"
"An Israeli is going through passport control at JFK... The immigration officer asks: ""Occupation?"" The Israeli says: ""No. I'm just visiting."""
"To get to the other side. Why did the chicken use the time machine?"
"Kanye deleted all the slander like we didn't have an hour to grab screenshots and make power point presentations"
"Girl I work with says to me, ""Why dont you like Taylor Swift? Shes awesome!"". Because I knew she was trouble when she walked in."
"What's the difference between an apple and a hormone? You can't hear an apple"
"what kind of meat does a priest eat on fridays? Nun."
"When you're feeling down just remember you are unique Just like everyone else"
"Push up bras A push-up bra is like a bag of chips. You open it up and its half empty."