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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a freezer and a woman? A freezer doesn't fart when I pull my meat out."

"Granny Porn Having a Granny Porn fetish must be awesome. The best days of you and your wife's sex life are always ahead of you."

"It's one of those days where you'll be lucky not to see me on the news."

"Moby jumped over a mountain.... of air. . . . . . . What did you expect?"

"I photobombed my pal's passport photo & now they won't let him through customs unless I'm behind him waving my hands in the air like a putz."

"True story: Surgeon: Did someone fart? Silence Surgeon: I need to know if someone farted. I may have perforated bowel. Med student: I farted"

"Tom Cruise starts a cooking show... ""Whisky Business."" Like a whisk.. not whisky.. you know like, the metal cooking utensil? This is funny...Right? Right?"

"The worst part about going to concerts is realizing people you'd otherwise think are freaks actually share your taste in music."

"Why do apes climb to the tops of buildings? The elevator men are on strike!"

"What is the definition of 'making love'? Something a woman does while a guy is f***ing her."