217681

Joke of the Day

"Nothing much worse than being forced to listen to someone else's music and not be able to tell them their taste is shit."

"You know what they say... 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name"

"How do you call a puzzled amputee? Stumped."

"What do we want? Time travel! When do we want it? Irrelevant!"

"two atoms are talking.. ""Hey Bob, why the long face?"" ""I've just lost an electron."" ""What, are you sure?"" ""Yes..... I'm positive."""

"I hired a person to randomly show up throughout the day and put baskets of bread on my desk."

"If Terminator had a horse, what would its name be? Termineightor I'll show myself out..."

"Cop failed me on the sobriety test even tho I not only touched my nose like he asked but went on & totally nailed the rest of the macarena."

"Why did Simba's father die? He couldn't Move Fasa"

"My snack didn't taste very good. Now I'm gonna hafta cleanse the palate w a large buffalo chicken pizza for lunch I know. Life's tough."