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Joke of the Day

"Nothing much worse than being forced to listen to someone else's music and not be able to tell them their taste is shit."

"Why did the.. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side"

"I'm glad twitter is new because nobody needs to see Michelangelo rt'ing every time someone mentions how majestic the Sistine Chapel is."

"BOSS: Don't just stand there. ME: Bust a move? BOSS: What? ME: Nothing, I'll go make some copies."

"I once watched two guys arguing in sign language. Either that, or they were both really bad at martial arts."

"What was the first 3D printer? Your butthole! *** This joke is awesome because it was created by a third grader where I teach."

"How many Scottish highlanders does it take to change a light bulb? There can be only one."

"Africa and Asia are playing baseball Asia strikes out Africa, Europe"

"People act surprised when I tell them my grandfather survived the holocaust. Most of the guards survived didn't they?"

"I've GOT to get a life stenographer. It'd be great to say, ""Betty, read back last night so I can see why I put a skillet on my nightstand."""