217354

Joke of the Day

"Life...it's just an ""F"" in lie."

"Customer: ""I'm running Windows '95."" Tech: ""Yes."" Customer: ""My computer isn't working now."" Tech: ""Yes you said that."""

"How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? You mean you don't know?!"

"A vegan invited my friends and I to a vegan restaurant.... the food really lettuce down."

"My wife said she wants another baby and if I play my cards right, I can be the father."

"The consequences of electing Trump... There will be heil toupee"

"An assistant to a company's offices in Karnataka found the title on his business card embarrassingly abbreviated. ""Mysore Ass."""

"When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever."

"One day I'm probably going to be too lazy to breathe and just die."

"What is the bank manager's favourite type of football? Fiver side!"