216678

Joke of the Day

"*at the gym* Trainor: Have a donut. Me: Wow! Sure! T: Here's some pizza. M: What kind of trainer are you? T: I'm a Megan Trainor."

"What is a Detective's favourite pastry? The Tooth Hurts Donut!"

"A man asks a bartender: ""How late does the band play?"" ""Only about half a beat behind the drummer."" The bartender replies."

"Papa tomato, Mama tomato and little tomato, are walking down the street. little tomato is walking a little slow so pap walks up and says... ketchup."

"I'm fat and get laughed at when I say I have an eating disorder But I wouldn't be fat if I could stop eating disorder, datorder, and da other one too"

"These boots were made for walking, and that's just what they'll do. One of these day--oh goddamn it. Did you glue these to the floor, Carl?!"

"I only have two feelings, it's either ""I'm hungry"" or ""I shouldn't have eaten this much"""

"[pulls into taco bell drive thru] Hi, I'd like enough tacos to forget 2016"

"My girlfriend is amazing, she is a Chinese food chef So shes very Lo Mein-tenance"

"I would tell you a complicated joke But there is no chance that your incapable human mind has any possibility of comprehending what it means."