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Joke of the Day

"Two silk worms were in a race. They ended up in a tie."

"Asked my 1st grade students the riddle: What has four fingers and a thumb but is not alive? (A glove.) First response: ""My Aunt Lydia."""

"What do you call a picture of an electric piano? Photosynthesis!"

"My girlfriend asked me to get her off. I told her it was a little cold outside to be needing bug spray."

"All I'm hearing about today is a really awesome owl A superb owl at that, I don't get it."

"revolting SERVANT: Ms. Pao, the Redditors are revolting! PAO: Well, you're not so pretty yourself..."

"an unfaithful man what does an unfaithful man say to his wife after having sex? I'll be home in half an hour."

"""And this is Flegh, Fnnnr, Grmm, Jsssh and Jhee-Jo."" (What My Brain Hears When Introduced to a Group of People)"

"f Germany is the ""Fatherland"" and Russia is the ""Motherland"", was the Second World War a divorce case?"

"When I finally break up with my boyfriend I'm just going to yell ""UNFOLLOW"" and then walk away."