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Joke of the Day

"Why is kim jong un such an asshole? he's mentally il."

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"Dubai don't like 'The Flintstones'... Abu Dhabi do."
"What did the photocopier say about its favorite purchased song? That's my pay-per jam."
"How many ""friend zoned"" guys does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it and get mad when it won't screw."
"What is it called when you walk away from your banana cream pie in the Sahara? Deserting your dessert in the desert. I feel some banana jokes about to be inserted in this thread tho"
"Just used shampoo so fortifying that a giant brick wall manifested around me in the shower & I guess this is my home now."
"*air horn sound* *second air horn sound* Me: ""This isn't deodorant."" *air horn sound* *second air horn sound* Me: ""This isn't deodorant."""
"TIL that Harriet Tubman sought a monthly pension of $25 a month for services in the civil war ,but was only awarded $20. 100+ years later we're still only giving her a $20."
"Mom! Mom! ""I want to play with grandpa"" ""Shut up I'm too tired to dig him up right now"""
"I dropped french class because my teach was a dick... I was late on the first day and he said i was a retard."