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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend left me when I refused to go the gym with her. It's a shame our relationship didn't work out."

"What do you call someone who doesn't like The Simpsons? A Homerphobe! LOL! Just made that up!"

"Friend: Do I need to repeat myself? Me: No. I might not be able to ignore you a second time"

"Where does a dog go when he loses his tail a retail store"

"Why don't the other DC heroes like Nightwing? He's always being a dick to them."

"How did Dr Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster? On a piece rate."

"Today my mum told me I wasn't an only child.... Today my mum said that I was an only child. I said, I already knew that mum seeing as dad is in jail for rape."

"Thought all these voices in my head meant I was crazy, but one of them is a therapist. And he says I'm fine."

"Yarrr, have ye seen me mizzenmast? It's mizzen."

"Another Old Blonde Joke A brunette yells to a blonde across a river, ""Hey! How do I get to the other side of the river?"" The blonde yells back ""You are on the other side!"""