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Joke of the Day

"If a tree falls in the woods can I stand under it so I don't have to go to work tomorrow?"

"Whenever i have a headache,i take two asprins and keep away the children,like the bottle says"

"What does a sarcastic fishing-rod with a broken reeler say? No, reely?"

"Tech Support: ""Which format are the images you send?"" Customer: ""Rectangular 15x11 centimeters."""

"Renewing your wedding vows is like agreeing on a double life sentence to prison."

"My biggest fear is that I have already discovered time travel and I will bump into myself and spoil the surprise."

"A warning to prisoners of the Matrix Snitches get glitches"

"If this evening got any more bland and disappointing it would be a menu item at Applebee's."

"A religious American just went on a killing spree with out killing anyone. Talk about a bad AIMish"

"Damn girl, are you a math book? Girl:No, why? Because you've got so many problems."