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Joke of the Day
"Why did the janitor get fired from the bank? Because he cleaned out the vault."
Next Joke
"What do you call a frog that's in the mood? A HORNY TOAD!"
"Q: What did the painter say to the wall? A: One more crack, and I'll plaster you."
"Is Google a Boy or a Girl? A girl, because it tries to complete your sentences for you, and it *never ever* forgets what you said."
"[I am wearing a wedding gown at work] BOSS: Do you have a minute to chat in my office? ME: [lifting veil] I do"
"Did you fall from heaven? Because so did Satan. -Stolen from youtube"
"*hairstylist holds mirror behind my head after styling my hair* ""Is that ok for you sir?"" ""Yes that is a beautiful mirror. I'll take it"""
"Why aren't snowmen called snow women? Because they're in the kitchen melting."
"What do a dead fish and dog shit have in common? They are both front-page material on reddit"
"ME: i thought i saw a new color today WIFE: wait- is this..are you.. M: but it- W: oh no M: was just- W: dont M: a pigment of my imagination"