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Joke of the Day

"Conjunctivitis.com That's a site for sore eyes"

"Did you hear about the new $5 million dollar Kentucky State Lottery? The winner gets $5 for a million years."

"I think I just passed a Pussy Willow. I couldn't see clearly because there was a big bush in front of it."

"What do you call a pair of nervous wigwams? Too tense."

"Please do not compare your dog problems to parenting. Your dog cannot say your name 3,258 times in a day."

"Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? Q: Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? A: Because he doesn't want anyone to know he's screwing the chickens."

"Butterflies are like regular flies, but they live at Paula Deen's house."

"I just responded to a text message with: I can't hear you, you're breaking up"

"What sort of violin does a ghost play? A dreadivarius."

"Why don't quantum physicists have sex? When they find the position, they don't have the momentum. When they have the momentum, they can't find the position."