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Joke of the Day

"I just watched two mice screwing in a lightbulb But for the life of me, I can't figure out how they got in there."

"A Haiku A problem that I Have with haikus is that I Always run out of"

"""Better to be pissed off than pissed on!"" Actually, I prefer a third scenario where I'm not angry or covered in piss."

"I pretend to work as long as they pretend to pay me."

"A is for apple B is for bear C is for candy D is for your mom"

"What's the opposite of quantum physics? Logic. (If you don't like physics jokes, just keep movin') ...(if you don't like math jokes, trust me, sometimes it makes a difference)."

"How do you know when there's a lead singer at the door? The knocking is all out of rhythm, they can't find the key, and they never know when to come in!"

"A horse-drawn carriage sounds really romantic until you realize horses can't even hold a pen and the carriage just looks like a scribble."

"So two reddit mods walk into a bar... ...ya think the second one would have seen it."

"They are removing all the phones in china Seems too many Wings got the Wong number"