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Joke of the Day

"I went to the bar with my 21 year old girlfriend... They called me a pedophile because I was 42. That totally ruined our 10 year anniversary."

"Heard of the man who banged an ATM? He came into a lot of money"

"I had coffee with Red Bull this morning... After about 10 minutes on the highway, I realized I left my car at home."

"A Good Lawyer Knows the Law A good lawyer knows the law; a great lawyer knows the judge."

"old man's advice when you're young, she just takes your breath away, but once you're older, you realize she's suffocating you."

"Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Heart failure"

"What do you call two hobos hitting each other with cardboard Pillow Fight"

"Rene Descartes walks into a bar. The bartender says, ""Would you like a beer?"" Descartes says, ""I think not,"" and vanishes."

"Why are Redditors so good at fencing? Because they always riposte."

"Me: I was so happy before I lost my forearms in that shark attack Therapist: How do you feel now? Me: With my elbows"