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Joke of the Day

"I prayed for snow on my wedding... No snow, but I did get 6 inches on my honeymoon."

"Blind jokes? didn't see that coming.."

"Bodyguard Idea: Clowns. No one will come anywhere near you."

"Why didn't the man report his stolen credit card? The thief was spending less then his wife."

"Scientists just announced the discovery of another planet in our solar system They're calling it Plu-two"

"Whats the best way to pick up chicks Lean over and pick them up with your hands."

"I was having sex with this girl last night and she kept screaming the wrong name all night. I wonder who tape is..."

"Just a heads up guys, M. Night Shyamalan dug a hole in my backyard and has been filming Mark Wahlberg yelling at it for 6 months now."

"My fire alarm just went off because I took my shower. Ya, I know I'm hot when I'm naked, but come on now, let's all just calm down."

"Do you know why women aren't allowed in space? * To avoid scenarios like: ""Houston, we have a problem!"" * ""What is the problem?"" * ""Yeah, great, pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about!"""