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Joke of the Day

"I hope it's not too weird the next time I get a haircut and the barber asks, ""So, how do you want it?"" and I reply, ""Like Ellen DeGeneres."""

"Do we still not know who let the dogs out?"

"What do you throw on stage at a mouse strip club? Kraft Singles."

"TIFU by giving someone the wrong sandwich at a deli Whoops, wrong sub"

"If all of Ireland sank, what part of it wouldn't? County Cork"

"Thanks for telling me what BOGO means... It means a great deal to me."

"A teacher finds his students have drawn penises on the whiteboard, so he rubs them all off. He is now a registered sex offender."

"About to go for a run, because shoplifting"

"Where do fish keep their money? In the river bank."

"I recently came into a very large sum of money so they fired me from my job at the bank."