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Joke of the Day

"My drug of choice is laughter....and cocaine. Mostly cocaine. Sometimes angel dust. Molly is cool too. RT if you love Jesus."

"Why did the vampire take up acting? It was in his blood."

"ISIS fighters dress as women in desperate attempt to flee battlefield They literally had to drag themselves out of the battlefield."

"TIL of a man who masturbated in public for 16 hours straight before police arrived. He was wrist strained."

"No one seems to like my gallows humor. They get so hung up about it."

"Melania Trump immigrated to America in 1996 And after her speech I now see why Donald says that ""all immigrants are thieves"""

"""i before me, excepts after we.."" - gollum in elementary school"

"BREAKING NEWS: Due to the horrible conditions at Sochi, the Olympics have been moved to a much safer place.. Chernobyl."

"What does a redneck say after sex? Thanks, sis."

"How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb? One, or two? Three, or four?"