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Joke of the Day

"It's OK to kiss a nun , but, don't get into a habit ."

"Why is oxygen like sex? Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any."

"What do you call a dictionary on drugs? An addictionary Alternatively: High definition"

"I failed my Biology test yesterday I was asked to name a parasite currently living in Britain. Apparently 'Muslims' isn't the correct answer."

"You're so poor I saw you kicking a can across the street I asked you what you were doing you said moving."

"I'm never at a loss for words when I'm drunk. I just can't pronounce most of them and I make up three or four new one's."

"The early bird gets the worm... but the second mouse gets the cheese!"

"Hey guys. I think I've found Liam Neeson in these toilets. Shhh listen, every time I bash on the door he yells, ""This one's Taken 2."""

"You need some more fuel for that fire? Cause I got some wood for you right here."

"I have a tattoo of a gigantic bruise on my left ankle in case anyone ever asks me to go hiking. Or help them move."