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Joke of the Day

"I mix up the Marvel and DC universes on purpose just for the angry sex"

"You know you're ugly when you call yourself ugly and no one disagrees with you."

"Thinking of starting an all Asian band Just so we can be called GnarLee"

"*looks up from phone* ""Kids!! we're leaving the playground in 22 percent."""

"What do truck drivers and porn stars have in common? They both get paid by the load."

"[OC] Why don't dyslexics like the story of King Arthur? They think it's about the romance and majesty of Camelto."

"How do you...? How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? Give it aids."

"Masturbation is like procasination In the end you're just fucking yourself"

"When a guy texts ""your beautiful,"" reply with ""my beautiful what?"" then laugh and laugh and never talk to that nice idiot again."

"Ain't therapy great? He yawns, but doesn't seem bored, If you think of his bill, you are poor, If you're feeling blue, and want to get screwed, ""The Rapist"" -it's there on his door."