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Joke of the Day

"A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a door. And a staircase. I don't think hes alright now."

"*uses blood from wounds to write my killer's name on the floor* I...will be...avenged. NO! BAD DOG! DON'T LICK THAT! DADDY NEEDS JUSTICE!"

"2 Jehovah's witnesses knocked earlier, so I invited them in. I gave 1 the hoover & 1 a mop. If they can do Gods work, they can do mine."

"Why are Vampires Democrats? They want Gore in 2000."

"Why do girls have boobs? So you got something to look at while you're talking to them *Peter Griffin* hehehehe"

"What is the best contraceptive for old people? Nudity"

"What's the difference between my bike and your mom? Your dad doesn't watch when I ride my bike."

"How did the elephant get out of the river? Wet"

"How can you make a basset hound fast? Take away its food!"

"""What did George Washington Abraham Lincoln and Christopher Columbus all have in common? They were all born on holidays."""