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Joke of the Day
"Why do French people only ever have one egg for breakfast? Because one egg is *un uf*"
Next Joke
"Whats black on top but white on bottom? Rape."
"Have you guys seen that great television show, ""Candy Crush Saga With The Sound From Another Television Show Playing In The Background?"""
"Your mother is deaf I guess that's why she didn't move around a lot."
"I like my women like I like my M.C. Escher paintings Impossibly proportioned"
"Anyone who's says, ""It's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all"", has obviously never gone through a divorce."
"You ever notice how many narcissistic pirates there are? Everyone I meet won't stop saying Aye!"
"""Alexa, yell at my kids to behave every 7 minutes. I'm headed to the bar."""
"I once met a man from Nantucket... ...He didn't understand limericks, either."
"I think I can speak for everyone when I say that I am a ventriloquist."