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Joke of the Day

"A fine piece of art is like a fine piece of ass, I don't understand either one but I want to take both home and mount them against the wall."

"Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're brave enough."

"No thanks, Party Casino; if I wanted to gamble when watching porn, I'd start the video with the volume on full and my door wide open."

"Whats the difference between a refrigerator and a gay man? Refrigerators don't fart when you pull the meat out."

"What's the difference between a Pizza and an onion? No one cries when you cut up Pizza."

"[Interrupts the wedding vows] it's open bar right?"

"My wife and I were happy for twenty years... Then we met."

"Fcuk you Adobe! I spend more time downloading Adobe updates than i've ever spent using Adobe."

"How does a mathematician get rid of constipation? He works it out with a pencil."

"What's do pot and pusssy have in common? You can tell the quality if you can smell it across the room."