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Joke of the Day
"How does a blind parachutist know when to pull his rip-chord? The leash goes slack..."
Next Joke
"If you think the way to a mans heart is through his stomach.... Then you're aiming too high"
"Why do black people like to ""whip"" when dancing? Because for one they aren't on the receiving end! Yes I know i am being racist, so dont point it out"
"What's the difference between Shea Stadium and Sloan-Kettering? At Sloan-Kettering the Mets always win."
"Anyone who says having a child is the best moment of their life has obviously never had two mars bars fall out of a vending machine at once."
"Your mom doesn't understand Your dad doesn't understand Your friends don't understand But french fries, french fries understand you"
"FYI: hey my wife came home in a terrible mood and I figured I'd read her one of my tweets to cheer her up, turns out that's a bad idea guys"
"Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak."
"*Sleeping Beauty gives rotten apple to Obama* *Obama faints* Only a kiss from his one true love will save him *Biden takes out lipstick*"
"Did you see that crazy news story on the internet? Of course. You reddit"