210502
Joke of the Day
"What do you use to gamble on vacation? Pair-a-dice!"
Next Joke
"Do you guys know the difference between ""girlfriend"" and ""girl friend?"" ... that little empty void in the middle.. Known as the ""friend zone"" .."
"""Only God can judge me"" People who've never been to Whole Foods."
"[dean tries handing me a diploma as I walk across the stage] I have a boyfriend"
"Why shouldn't you buy a Unionmade watch? For every day it's working, it will break twice, yet still skips ahead half an hour while you're eating lunch."
"Knock Knock Who's there? Allah Allah who? Allahu Ackbar! /r/unexpectedjihad"
"I'll see your fun outdoor activity and raise you a nap."
"How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them."
"A group of mimes kidnapped me They did unspeakable things to me"
"Det. Chick Pea at your service. What do you call it when a chickpea smashes another chickpea to death. Hummuscide Thank you, I'll let myself out..."